inspiration

This Day At the Vicarage 9-10-20

/ joseph elon lillie / Leave a comment

We are just returning from walking the dogs for their last time tonight. The night air is that sloppy mixture of fall moisture and late summer heat that makes the world a clammy box of night time slime. It isn’t raining exactly but the rolling fog leaves me feeling damp and somehow dirty.

We made it just around the first corner tonight when we noted a family walking three dogs: two little ones on leashes and a black lab off leash. Our two boys immediately started barking in the gathering dark. The lab looked up from his meander not taking much interest. Still, neither Brenda nor I were in much of a state to take on a wandering “big dog” should the need arise. We turned around and headed back to the Vicarage. The dogs did their business and are now off to bed.

I think Brenda will not be far behind. She started work at an apple orchard today. The orchard is owned by the nephew of one of our deacons at Cornerstone. His Aunt is doing the scheduling for the orchard. The Aunt has offered part time positions to several people in our church. It is an open door so Brenda has walked through. Who nows what wonders it will lead to?

Walking through open doors...God opens doors that no man can close. Believe that! #opportunity | Greatful, Doors, Opportunity

While Brenda was off sorting apples, I taught a music lesson and then visited one of the members of our congregation. Amanda went in to the church to do some administration work and then went to do our grocery shopping.

Our lives are all moving in separate direction every day. Tomorrow Brenda will be back at the apple orchard, I will be conducting a funeral service and Amanda will be preaching an on-line children’s sermon. Yet somehow God keeps our schedules in some kind of synchronicity so we can do this thing called family. We meet in the middle around the meals I cook (not that anyone greatly admires my cooking but they all put on a brave face). Then we are off again on our tethers to do the work that God has given us to do. There is coming a time soon when this walk in the world’s evening will be done. A big dog, off leash, is coming and God is going to be turning us towards our true home. That truth makes me wonder how important all our doing right now really is. Maybe it is vastly important because these are the last works the church will do in the church age. Maybe it is all just obeying the leash holder on a walk through the park. Which ever it may be, I am going to obey the tug of the lead whichever way it goes and when we come to that final door. I will walk through.

Walking Through the Open Door | From the Desk of Keith Duncan

This Day At the Vicarage 9-8-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 4 Comments

I often write with music playing softly in the background. Somehow the rhythm and the sound help me to focus on what it is I need to say. It is like the sound draws the words out of me.

Maybe that has something to do with my years as a worship pastor. I remember one of my mentors teaching me that in order to lead worship effectively, I needed to be able to move beyond the place where I played music into the place where the music played me.

Yesterday I wrote to an Epic Celtic Album on Youtube. Tonight I am playing the Easters. Somehow their music fills me with hope and just a touch of melancholy. Those things might not seem to go together. Maybe they don’t. Maybe they are polar opposites like the yellow and purple on a color wheel.

Color Wheel Primer | HGTV

Maybe that tension is what I am looking for when I write or when I sing or when I do art. Maybe it is what I need. Maybe it is what is required for me to move into my muse. The muse would be God ,so I guess that makes sense. The tension….the inner conflict somehow drives me to seek the Lord and in that seeking I find my creative spark. And that creative spark is the pathway to the music playing me instead of me playing the music or in this case it is the pathway to the space where the Writer reveals to me my story rather than me striving to make it up.

There’s a whole book in there somewhere. The tension is rising within me and that means the story is about to arrive.

Now I am really looking forward to tomorrow dear friends.

Pastor J

This Day At the Vicarage 9-7-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 1 Comment

Yesterday I was back at my usual job for a Sunday morning, as on-line pastor. I am really enjoying this new work. My job starts at about 9:15 A.M. I open my computer and start “inviting people to church”. Mostly that just involves a check in on Facebook Messenger.

Mad At Computer Png - Guy Working On A Computer , Free Transparent Clipart - ClipartKey

I sign onto the church livestream when it comes on, and then from my little perch in the church cafe I begin to engage with people attending the on-line service: I comment as the sermon goes along; I “like” and comment on what other people are saying; Sometimes I move to a private message format so I can go a little deeper with people who are popping up on my feed or sometimes even just in my head.

Who I don’t see walking through the church door in the morning or on-line is just as important as who does come to our service in physical form or through the internet. When someone is missing for a bit I use service time to try and find them virtually. Yesterday I missed several people so I sent messages to them during service.

Yesterday I also used the time to launch a remote fellowship campaign with our artist’s group. In two weeks time we will be starting an artist version of chopped.

Chopped | Food Network

One of our artists is donating boxes full of art supplies and so we will make up boxes for all the participating artists and each artist will have a month to create a work of art using all the implements in the box. At the end of the month we will do on-line reveals for the whole artistic community.

Church is definitely different now. People of God are having to find new and creative ways to connect around the Word of God, fellowship and prayer. I don’t know when or if it will go back to what it used to be. Honestly, I am having fun facing these new challenges. I am not sure I want it to go back.

Well, I have blathered on long enough. It is time to sign off for the night.

I am looking forward to tomorrow Dear Friends.

Pastor J

This Day At the Vicarage 8-31-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 9 Comments

Yesterday I preached at Cornerstone Church in WInchendon, A message called “A Message For the Moment.” After church one of our parishioniers came over to the Vicarage to look at the dormers atop the house to see if he might be able to fix them for me before winter. The meeting took all of 15 minutes making me right on time to fix lunch for Mom.

After lunch the sabbath slump hit me. It came as it always does, a sudden rush of weariness that left me able to do almost nothing but lay on the couch sliding in and out of sleep. At three I walked the dogs and then took a short ride with Amanda around the area to see sites. We stopped by the mountain to take a few pics.

When we got back I had just enough energy to make supper before my body crashed once again. The rest of the night was spent watching TV on the couch. I rested. I practiced sabbath.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I have long had a love/hate relationship with this discipline called sabbath. I think I have struggled with it because of what sabbathing requires of me….because of what resting requires of me. Most of the people around me approach the Sabbath and the act of sabbathing as a day off, a day to have fun. They get to their day off. They go to the beach. They rake the lawn. They have friends over for a barbecue. They go and visit gramma. They go to Maine for the afternoon…..Meanwhile I crawl into bed and sleep for twelve hours. A really active sabbath for me is to lay on the couch and watch TV for eight hours after my nap, like I did yesterday.

Now there is a piece of me that is good with this. That piece of me knows I need this if I am to function the rest of the week like a normal human being. But there is a piece of me that really struggles to be like all the people around me. I want to be the guy who gets out of church and drives to Lynn to have lunch with my daughter and her family. I want to be like my sister who got done with her responsibilities at church yesterday and then drove to her friend’s house forty five minutes away and then painted canvas until after dark.

Here’s the thing. I can do all those things on Sunday. I can push off the Sabbath slump for a bit as long as I am prepared to slump on Monday. I cannot escape it. If I schedule myself so busy that I can’t Sabbath one day a week, I become this crabby Zombie monster who cannot function in any form of godliness. I revert to my old sinful self.

History of Zombies - HISTORY

I watch other people and think how weak I am because I can’t seem to do what everyone else does. Then I think maybe their not really doing it either. Maybe they really are just better at hiding their sinful zombie monster selves than I am.

Let me ask you dear friends….HOW DOES REST LOOK IN YOUR LIFE? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON’T REST THE RIGHT WAY?

I am looking forward to tomorrow dear friends!

Pastor J

This Day At the Vicarage 8-29-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 10 Comments

I awoke this morning with one of those leg cramps that make you scream yourself awake. You know the kind I mean, the kind where you are mindful enough to know that if you could just get to your feet the pain would stop, the kind which is so painful you cannot move out of the position you have contorted into.

What are Muscle Cramps and How Can They be Treated Naturally

After a minute of deep breathing through the worst of the pain, I swung my feet off the bed. I realized the day was dark and rainy, a reminder from God that I was in my current situation probably because I had let myself get dehydrated yesterday.

I pushed myself off of the bed. I thought back to yesterday and remembered that the Lord had changed up my sermon for Sunday on me. I was working in Psalm 84. Then, in my afternoon devotion the Lord had pushed me into Isaiah 8:11-20. When one sermon supplants another the sensation can be sort of like an emotional earthquake, especially when the supplanting comes on Friday afternoon. My new sermon prep got as far as reading the new verses to my sister after an evening ride around the area. Then I settled into an evening of wrestling internally with what I was to make out of the new passage given me. I went to bed with no more idea of what I was going to preach than when I first got the new verses in the afternoon.

This morning, as I paced about my bedroom trying to get my right calf muscle to release, the brain fog of sleep dissipated and I began to realize God had downloaded all the points of my new sermon while I was sleeping.

HAS ANYTHING LIKE THIS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?

MIND BLOWN - Imgur

Well you know I hobbled to my computer, and set the new outline down. I sent it off to my technical director so he could create the powerpoint. Then I heard the Lord say. “I have given you rain. Allow it to pace you. Allow it to slow you down to the place of prayer you need to be ready.”

So I have slowed down. I have hydrated. I have stretched. Most importantly, I have prayed and now I can say.

I am excited to see what tomorrow brings dear friends.

Pastor J

This Day At the Vicarage 8-25-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 1 Comment

Since the pandemic started I have found myself rising later than usual. My old pattern was to be up and going by 4:30 or 5 in the morning. I would have half a day’s work done by the time every one else was up. That was a necessary thing because by 2 in the afternoon I would start to crash. Back then I would nap briefly and get ready for my night time work (usually a service or some kind of meeting).

Jacopo is still up every morning at 4:30 A.M. like clock work (literally you can set your watch by him). Now, though, he only wants to jump off the bed and settle in his carry cage to catch some more Z’s. Mercedes always sleeps right up by head on the pillow to my right. They are good until 6:30 or 7 A.M. now. At least three or four mornings a week it is this way.

The strangest thing is this new schedule which includes more rest seems to make me more productive. I am writing far more than I ever did before. I am getting more done around the house than I have done in all my time living here… and while I am no longer doing meetings upon meetings and services upon services, the ministry I am doing now feels somehow deeper and more ministerial.

I think that has something to do with how the nature of the work has changed. I have moved from being primarily an administrator and preacher (or singer as the case were) to being a pastor and contemplative monastic prophet. Somehow this fits better with my gifts.

But while this is true of me, my daughter has shifted to a lot of administration within the church. She is thriving in this new role.

It is interesting how the pandemic is being used to push us into the areas of our actual giftings. It feels like God is setting something big up behind the scenes. I am keeping watch to see what He is doing.

These are my thoughts today in a nutshell. We are now at the time where I must sign off and say…

I am looking forward to tomorrow Dear Friends!

Pastor J

This Day At the Vicarage 8-20-20

/ joseph elon lillie / 4 Comments

I just wanted to put a quick word in tonight before heading to bed. It’s been a busy couple of days at the Vicarage. By that I mean it has been busy in a slow constant, intentional way. Slow, constant and intentional is the way I try to pace myself now, even as the world tries to get me back to running full tilt like I used to do.

Photo by Alex Powell on Pexels.com

I have known for years that I was supposed to be slowing down. I have said it to many of you over the decade of blogging. Many of my parishioniers have told me I should slow down. It just never seemed possible. Then at the end of last year God began to talk to me about a coming season I would spend in the “sage’s cave”. I didn’t realize it was going to take a pandemic to get me here, but now that I am in this space of deep lifestyle prayer I am not going back.

Photo by Brady Knoll on Pexels.com

That said I have had things to do these last two days that have kept me going at the top of my slow speed.

I met with my Sectional Presbyter yesterday (some of you might call him a bishop). I had to retake a portion of my latest credentialing test because of a clerical error. So it was off to Leominster MA to get that done. Then last night Amanda and I led The Wall Prayer meeting at Cornerstone.

The Wall is Cornerstone church’s remote prayer meeting. Amanda and I taught and prayed through “the prayer for strength” for our on line congregation.

Today started with me giving a singing lesson. Then once I got home the phone was very active with several pastoral calls. I ended the afternoon with a visit from one of the artists from our C.cada Community.

Lisa and I talked about the direction of our community. It is a conversation I am beginning to have with all of our artists. Pandemic has kept us from meeting since February. We have tried a few Zoom calls but they have not worked very well. So last month I began engaging people in on-line conversation and this month I am doing micro-gatherings with the artists to see how we are going to proceed: Facebook live teachings, micro gatherings and even virtual art shows are all on the table for discussion. I am encouraged by these winds of change and excited to see what God has for our next steps.

Well I have crossed the 11 P.M. zone and 4:30 A.M. is just around the corner; So I will sign off here saying…

I am looking forward to tomorrow dear friends.

Pastor J