My Momma broke one of her steak chompers last night while she was out at this thing the humans call “Dinner & a Movie with Babs.”

I don’t know what “Dinner & a Movies is” I especially don’t know what “&” is, but “Babs” is a lady who lives in the little black box Momma hits with her fingers and talks to everyday. Well, at least she’s the face of a lady in the black box. Actually, the box has lots of faces and one of those faces that sometimes talks back is this lady “Babs”.

So after “Dinner & a Movie With Babs” Momma had to go to something she called “The Dentist”. All day this is what she looked like whenever anybody said those words “The Dentist”.

I don’t like it when Momma looks like that. It makes me worried. When I am worried I can get a little barky, but today I tried to be really good, and I was really good until I got nervous and pooped on the floor in “First Smell’s” room. “First Smell” is the one Flirken calls “He Who Wears Stupid Hats.”

It’s true he does wear a lot of stupid hats, but I call him “First Smell” because he was the first thing I smelled when I came out of my dog Momma’s belly.

Every dog has a “First Smell”. My dog Momma’s and dog Papa’s First Smell is the one Flirken calls “The She”.

Now that you mention it, I haven’t seen Flirken around in a while. Maybe he is off world fighting the loathsome Kree. Or maybe he went to help Momma with “The Dentist”. Maybe “The Dentist” is like the Kree because it seems that when his name is spoken everyone gets a look on their faces.

I hope Flirken did go to help Momma because when she got back from ‘The Dentist” she looked like she’d been in a pretty big fight. Now she is laying on the couch with one of those blue cold things on her face like the one she put on her knee when the sheep knocked her over.

“First Smell” fed me and took me out for a walk. Now I am going to try to sit quietly in his room with dog Momma and dog Papa. I hope Momma feels better. Maybe tonight I’ll let her sleep with my green dragon or even my special spit covered snow ball. I think she’ll like that.