The last few nights have been difficult for Mom. She has been having a hard time sleeping. Last night when she did sleep she had vivid dreams that spilled over into waking hallucinations. We had chickens dancing on the ceiling and great anxiety over the house running out of oil. Haloperidol is one of the medications that is helping us through this part of her illness.
It’s Sabbath today and so I am spending some time resting in prayer. Mom has been a bit more restful throughout the morning so that has been helpful. Here are some quotes about reality I am thinking about today.
“Prepare! Prepare! Prepare! Prepare you Spirit (come out of the decay of your strongholds). Prepare your Souls(Prepare to practice and feel compassion). Prepare your facility (your structures, infrastructures and plans). Prepare for the storm (Pray for action plan, Pray for a spirit of perseverance). Prepare your witness (know your gifts, earn the right to speak, build your relationships with those outside the church, build your example). Prepare your hope and faith (think hope, speak hope, act in hope). Prepare your love (love each other, love the people in your towns, love those who disagree with you, love through the doors that open).“
OVER THE COURSE OF THE NEXT FEW MONTHS I WILL BE REPOSTING THESE DEVOTI0NAL THOUGHTS I WROTE DURING OUR CHURCH’S 21 DAYS OF FASTING AND PRAYER. TODAY WE CONTINUE TO…
PREPARE OUR SOULS TO PRACTICE AND FEEL COMPASSION.
In Matthew 9 the Bible says, “When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. 37 Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. 38 Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.”
A heart of compassion starts with God moving on that heart to see things the way He sees them. When we see a need that is the beginning of God moving on our hearts to build compassion. The recognition of the need is the first step.
When we begin to pray for God to send someone to meet the need we further align ourselves with His plan, because I promise you He wants to help.
I love that Jesus told the disciples to start praying for God to send someone to help and then as God He sent them into the very harvest field they were praying about…
Jesus called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out impure spirits and to heal every disease and sickness.
5 These twelve Jesus sent out with the following instructions: “Do not go among the Gentiles or enter any town of the Samaritans. 6 Go rather to the lost sheep of Israel. 7 As you go, proclaim this message: ‘The kingdom of heaven has come near.’ 8 Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy,[a] drive out demons. Freely you have received; freely give. Mat. 10:1, 5-8
When we learn we are the answer to our own prayers for help for others and then become willing enough to actually do something rather than make excuses we will have gained a heart of compassion.
At this moment, Mom is sleeping. She ate her first solid food in six days a little while ago. a quarter of a ham salad sandwich and a few chip crumbs. Amanda and I are sitting watching Murder She Wrote (the key to creating an atmosphere that keeps Mom calm).
Mom requires a two person assist since her last bout of illness. So I spent this morning making and sending out the weekly schedule to our family to make sure we have the proper coverage every day.
We have never kept a sedate schedule at The Vicarage. While our hours, as ministers and teachers, are flexible for the most part there is still a lot to do. While we have lots of hands in this work (and I am blessed for all the help). Each set of hands comes with an added layer of complexity. Keeping Joe and Kristine’s work at their schools and Amanda’s, Brenda’s and my visitation and preaching schedules in mind means scheduling takes some consideration.
Melanie and James are coming over a few times next week to make sure Brenda is not alone while Amanda and I are out at staff meeting.
I am also working to make sure the whole family is in the know about times and schedules for the PCA’s and nurses.
I am really thankful right now for Paul Hackett who trained me in scheduling all those years ago. I am also thankful to his wife Carrie, my personal assistant at church who has kept my schedule at church organized.
I know that in the days ahead communication is going to be a key to keeping our sanity and to giving Mom the best quality of life she can have now. That is the penultimate goal at the moment. Well, I just got an alert than Megan is about to arrive to help Mom with her daily wash up. So folks I am off. Keep us in your prayers as I keep you in mine.
Life took something of a hard right turn on Monday.
As regular readers will know, Mom started with hospice about three weeks ago. She started sleeping a lot on Saturday and Sunday and eating almost nothing. We also saw an increase in her pain level. Then on Monday she became very nauseous and her pain level spiked beyond control. She started vomitting dark black liquid. The nurse came out to help us, the doctor called and we made some adjustments to her meds. It was an intense 24 hours in which none of us got much sleep.
It seems we have moved very quickly to a new level of hospice. We now have the hospital bed mom had been resisting in house and the old couch she loved sleeping on removed. We have asked for and I think received an upgrade in PCA care to five days a week and today the doctor is coming out to review Mom’s meds to make sure we have what is needed for her comfort.
Dr. Harrington, the director of the hospice agency, is actually one of the doctors Mom worked with during her career as a nurse. She remembered him.
Today she is looking and feeling much better, but in the last few days Mom has eaten nothing more substantial than two or three scoops of ice cream. She seems to have no appetite for solid food. Good news… She has been drinking her Pedia-lyte and rehydrating. She is very weak. Walking to the bathroom is not at the moment a possibility. Thank God for all that has been provided in the way of adaptive tools, the transfer chair and commode my cousin gave us have been a life saver, and the hospice meds have been so helpful in keeping Mom comfortable.
I can’t say enough about the hospice staff who have been helping us through this season. They have all been so kind. I also am also so blessed by family and my congregation. So many in the church have reached out with offers of help. My friend, worship leader and deacon, Jody came to help me and my son, Joe, move the couch yesterday. My family, also, has really circled the wagons during this season. We all gathered and prayed together last night with many tears and much hope that God would see us through this life stage with grace and love.
Regardless of the hard right turn, I know God will see us through and we will end up right where we are supposed to be.
This year our church is focusing on seven prepare statements we are calling our 2024 congregational sentence.
“Prepare! Prepare! Prepare! Prepare you Spirit (come out of the decay of your strongholds). Prepare your Souls(Prepare to practice and feel compassion). Prepare your facility (your structures, infrastructures and plans). Prepare for the storm (Pray for action plan, Pray for a spirit of perseverance). Prepare your witness (know your gifts, earn the right to speak, build your relationships with those outside the church, build your example). Prepare your hope and faith (think hope, speak hope, act in hope). Prepare your love (love each other, love the people in your towns, love those who disagree with you, love through the doors that open).“
PREPARE YOUR SOULS TO PRACTICE AND FEEL COMPASSION.
Jesus was known as a man of compassion. Compassion is the movement of concern, love, pity. It is an emotion that results in action. Kind actions devoid of the emotions of concern, love and pity are not compassion. Further feeling concerned or loving or pitying without doing something as a result of those emotions is also not compassion.
Jesus did the things He did because He loved people and He pitied their condition. “When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” Matthew 9: 36
We must be like him!
WHAT ARE YOU PRAYING MORE FOR, COMPASSIONATE FEELINGS OR COMPASSIONATE ACTIONS TO FOLLOW THROUGH?
This year God has given our congregation a Series of thoughts to focus on. We are calling this THE CONGREGATIONAL SENTENCE. It reads: “Prepare! Prepare! Prepare! Prepare you Spirit (come out of the decay of your strongholds). Prepare your Souls(Prepare to practice and feel compassion). Prepare your facility (your structures, infrastructures and plans). Prepare for the storm (Pray for action plan, Pray for a spirit of perseverance). Prepare your witness (know your gifts, earn the right to speak, build your relationships with those outside the church, build your example). Prepare your hope and faith (think hope, speak hope, act in hope). Prepare your love (love each other, love the people in your towns, love those who disagree with you, love through the doors that open).“
Each week I am going to take one day to speak to one of these thoughts. Today I am writing on:
PREPARing YOUR SPIRIT(COME OUT OF THE DECAY OF YOUR STRONGHOLDS).
Paul the apostle gives us this instruction. “We are human, but we don’t wage war as humans do. 4 [a]We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. 5 We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ. 6 And after you have become fully obedient, we will punish everyone who remains disobedient.”2 Cor. 10:3-6
Fighting the good fight of faith and tearing down strongholds cannot be accomplished by using worldly methods of fighting and resisting. The Art of War cannot help us when it comes to fighting spiritual battles. Anger, aggression, fighting, confronting, rebuking are nearly useless when it comes to spiritual warfare. It is not for nothing that Paul indicates that the weapons of our warfare in Ephesians chapter 6 are almost all defensive.
The real key to fighting spiritual battles and tearing down spiritual strongholds is not found in what we tear down or get rid of but of what we build in place of the stronghold.
Paul writes in Galatians 5 So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. …the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!
SO WHICH OF THE FRUITS OF THE SPIRIT ARE YOU GOING TO PRAY OVER YOUR LIFE AND STRONGHOLDS TODAY?
Back in the time before lead pastoring, when I was writing four blogs a day, I would have writing sessions. In those sessions which came about twice or three times a week I would write and schedule several blogs at a time into their respective time slots. I had a pretty organized schedule of which blogs were posted when.
These days I am happy when I just get seven blogs a week done on “Notes From the Vicarage”. I haven’t yet figured out how to schedule each post into its respective time slot, because while I am writing everyday (or just about everyday), it is still catch as catch can as to what time the writing gets done.
I had worked out a pretty good rhythm before life changed, but I am in a new movement in the symphony of life and so I am still figuring out the new tempo, meter and rhythm of this particular section. Part of this change is learning to give myself grace and space as I hunt and peck my way to my new normal. It’s funny. It took me almost two years to realize I needed a new normal.
ARE YOU A STICKLER FOR SCHEDULING OR DO YOU FIND IT EASIER TO JUST LET LIFE HAPPEN?
Notes From the Vicarage 